How It’s Done

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I saw you and I was impressed.  Of course, it may not have been you at all.  But if it was, you were on point.  It looked as though you were interviewing for the job you’ve always wanted.  You were prepared, polished and professional.  You arrived ten minutes before the hour, so I’m guessing you were early.  You were careful to check yourself over, making sure each hair was in place and you were ready.  And I gotta tell you, that splash of red was just right.  It offered just the right dose of personality without being gauche or irreverent.   All said, you nailed it.  If I had anything to do with it, you’re hired!

OK, true, I had nothing to do with it.  I can’t even say with any certainty that it was a job interview.  I was just being nosey and jumping to a lot of conclusions in the process.  But from where I was sitting, you made a great impression.

Seeing you go for it like that put such a smile on my face because you could have done it so differently. You could have not even tried.  Or you could have toned it down, bringing only what was required to the situation.  But instead, you brought it all.  You went for it.  Without knowing what you wanted or what you were going for, I knew you could do it.   And apparently you knew it too.

You reminded me of a very exciting Moto GP race last weekend.  If you didn’t see it, I won’t spoil it but, the finish was amazing.  But that wasn’t what captured my attention.  It was Valentino Rossi and others hanging their leg off their motorcycles as they came into the corners.  It seemed reckless to me, but my husband and son explained it as a move started by Rossi.  A quick google search suggests that the advantage of the “Rossi Leg Wave” is debatable.  But nonetheless, because he is considered a winner, others throughout the sport have followed his lead.  It may be that by doing what he does, they believe they will be winners too.  This “Rossi Leg Wave” is now associated with success.

Is success really that simple?  Perhaps it is.  It seems to start with knowing what you want.  Whether it is that big job, a new relationship, or even the big race, be clear that it is congruent with you and what you value.

Next, be ready. You may have to arrive before it does.  Show up early, without clutter or “mess” so that you can see it, recognize it, and be available to receive it in whatever form it takes.

That preparation will be so important because then you will know that you have earned what is coming.  You will trust that you deserve what you receive, rather than rejecting it, assuming it is for someone else.  Doing the hard work that is necessary will add value and will let you and others know that you can handle the stress and strain that will accompany the joy and satisfaction of your own success.

I also suggest trying on your success before you buy it.  In other words, notice little wins and notice how you do it.  And notice how you respond when you do.  Do you break too soon?  Or do you run right over the finish line without even realizing or appreciating it?  Make the necessary tweaks until you get it just right.

From where I’m sitting, you got this.  You may have to stick your leg out, but this race is yours to win.

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Psychological coaching is grounded in the art and science of psychology and is in many ways very similar to traditional psychotherapy.  They both utilize knowledge of human behavior, motivation, behavioral change, and interactive techniques in order to help a client move from where they are to an improved state of being. The differences between psychological coaching and traditional psychotherapy are related to their goals, focus, and perspective. Traditional psychotherapy seeks to diagnose and treat emotional and behavioral conditions, with the therapist serving as "expert" in support of the client. Unfortunately, many have considered the pursuit of traditional psychotherapy to be stigmatizing, in part because of this perspective of the client being "broken" and in need of repair.  Psychological  coaching offers a different point of view.  The coaching psychologist is more likely focused on developing a collaborative relationship, with the client in the "driver seat", with the perspective that the client is creative, whole, and resourceful.  The clients' capacity for wellness and healing is assumed, encouraging them to move more quickly and directly through obstacles to their happiness, success, and life satisfaction.  

As a Coaching Psychologist, my goal is to support you in creating awareness so that you can access your own skills and inner resources in order to manage the challenges you face now and into the future.  While our work together may touch on past traumas and psychiatric concerns, they will be addressed from the perspective of your strengths, rather than with a focus on ill-ness or disability.  In our larger community, it is not unusual for individuals to experience mild to moderate mental health issues, making psychological coaching an accessible and viable option.  If, in the course of our work together, either you or I have reason to believe that your mental or emotional health concerns are better addressed by another service provider, a referral will be made.  

As a Licensed Clinical Psychologist, I have 20 years of ongoing training and experience providing, consulting and supervising others in the provision of psychological services.  However,  as of now, the life coaching field is unregulated, allowing anyone to be a life coach - even those without training in the behavioral sciences.  As well, the coaching field is considered to lack a solid base in research, creating disagreement on educational and training standards. The International Coach Federation (ICF) is working to change this.  In order to ensure that your coach is not counseling others beyond their expertise, it is suggested that when considering a life coach, individuals  should seek coaches who are trained or ICF certified.  Along with my license as a Clinical Psychologist, I am currently enrolled in MentorCoach® L.L.C., one of the oldest ICF accredited coach training programs, and one that will enable me to be an ICF certified coach.